It's been a nightmare..

I never imagined that when I was rear ended and through no fault of my own I would have so much stress, tears and headache associated with this whole ordeal.

If you (like myself) have never been in an auto accident before, you are more and likely ignorant to everything (like myself). You want to believe in the good of the insurance companies. You want to believe that they aren't as evil as lawyers make them out to be.

You think, "okay,I was hurt, they will pay my medical bills as they come". Only, they don't. They won't pay until you settle. If you are like the majority of Americans and don't have health insurance, and your OWN insurance PIP (MedPay) is exhausted in hospital bills, you are virtually screwed.

(Before I go any further, I want to say I love my insurance company, State Farm, they have gone out of their way to reach out to the at fault company and help me, they have made calls on my behalf to get the adjuster(s) of the at fault company to call me back when they otherwise had given me the run around. I think having a policy with them, has proven time and again that they are a wonderful company with hearts. I won't mention the name of the at fault driver's company for legal reason, but it is an insurance giant. THANK YOU LORD, for my insurance, with out them I would have been royally hung out to dry. It also reaffirms my decision in keeping them for all my Dad's new construction policies, they are there when you need them, they don't dodge ball you, I'd recommend them to ANYONE)..

With no money to pay them yourself, and kids to feed, you know you are hurt, but you stop treatment in order to try and hurry a settlement so that your bills will be paid in a timely manner.

You realize any attorney will take 1/3rd of your settlement, and with your medical bills being high, and no real guarantee or no set in stone number of what they will even ask for during consultations, and you are told by attorney after attorney that they can't guarantee even your medical bills will be covered after their fees, you are left to your own devices.

You act as your own paralegal, you collect all your medical bills, you make copies of everything, calculate your mileage and fuel costs and out of pocket expenses and you prepare a demand letter to submit to the at fault insurance company.

You call them and nag them every other day, sometimes you give them a week.

Your bills are coming in and you are being threatened by the hospitals to have your account turned to collections. You are given the run around by all parties involved (those you owe money to, and those who owe money to you).

Your stress causes heartburn, your anxiety causes lost sleep and you don't know huge legal terms and kind of try to wing it. Eventually you do hear from the at fault insurance company who offers to pay all your medical but says they can only give you $1,000 for your personal injury/pain and suffering. Mind you your under duress and you have stopped treatment just in order to get the bill collectors at the facilities you were treated at off your back and to rush a settlement. You ask for slightly more. You tell them about your med pay and they offer to reimburse your med pay and hospital expenses.

You are left to think about it over night, meanwhile the big insurance giant knows they have you where they want you.

AND with all do respect, I know they have a job to do, but it just sucks you're unfortunately at their mercy, even when the accident was not your fault.

Two days go by and you call and call. No one calls back, so you ask to speak to their supervisor, only it's a message machine (always is). You inform them that you have done all you could on your part, you've done the leg work to collect all the bills, you've submitted everything accordingly and you demand a settlement or you will take their policy holder to court (who in turn can take their insurance agent to court for bad faith).

15 minutes later (literally) you get a call from your adjuster. You feel bad for calling on them, because it is their job, but you also feel bad for yourself because you're swamped in bills you should not have to be up to your ears in.

They offer $500 more. So at this point you have your medical bills being offered to be paid out (your main concern), your 2 thousand dollar med pay reimbursed to you and $1,500 from them. You say "I accept", just please pay these bills soon.

You are told, once you sign and fax this release, (releasing their policy holder and them from all future medical claims) and scan and upload it to them, they will cut you a check and pay out your providers within the next day. You read it over have a few questions but ultimately sign your life away and sent it over.

Within two hours the claims website emails you to notify you a check has been issued do your portion of the settlement.

After re reading the release you notice strange language, that includes property damage, and you think, "oh dear lord, did I just screw my insurance company out of their subrogation"?? You panic, you're up all night calling your insurance and theirs (mind you your insurance has yet to contact you about subrogation and you have no idea how it even works, just that you may of signed your rights away and become responsible for paying it back and your personal settlement doesn't even cover collision damages).

You're sick to your stomach, you cry your eyes out, you feel tricked and deceived and you submit a quick letter to the claims website asking to retract your signed release due to the fact "money is not in hand" as the contract states and that you felt you were not given all information needed and signed it under duress with out a witness.

The very next morning you get a call from the at fault company bright and early, promising that it's only a medical release and nothing more,promising subrogation will still be paid out. You feel relieved but still skeptical, so you record the entire conversation and the phone messages. You get a letter back from said insurance company promising it is only a medical release. You feel relieved...

FOR THE TIME BEING.

An attorney tells you it can be a trick, your insurance company says it should be fine and you're left praying this person has a heart and won't screw you over.

That is where I am today, two months exactly after my accident. A check is on the way - which will go directly to savings and untouched for a long time until all this is over - just in case. And your medical bills have yet to be paid off - STILL.

The icing to the cake? You get a final notice from the hospital today, to pay the remaining $2,500 you owe, even though your insurance company just forked them $2,000 in med pay. You ask for an extension until the at fault company pays it off and let them know you just settled and it will be any day now. They tell you, "no" and say you have 18 days to pay or you go to collections, you ask to set up a payment plan and are told it could take a week.

I am praying that this will all be over soon. I am praying so hard I never have to deal with this again. Someone who is injured through no fault of their own should NEVER have to go through what I have gone through. NEVER.

My spinal, and neck vertebrae are still dislocated, my stress is so high my blood pressure is higher than it's ever been, and my anxiety is insane. When I drive I always get a horrible burst of anxiety as some one gets too close or speeds up on my tail end. I don't feel I will ever be the same - EVER.

Was all this worth a $1500 settlement? I'd say NO, but when you have kids and need the bills off your back, it is.

My advice next time? (God forbid)? Go attorney shopping, find a good one. One who will not RUSH through the consult, one that wants to MEET with you IN PERSON, as opposed to just their paralegal. Sure an attorney is 1/3 contingency fee, BUT, they KNOW what they are doing (you do not), and chances are big insurance also knows this and will toy with your emotions.

It's worth it to not have the stress. COMPLETELY.

I pray to god it wasn't worse, and I am thankful to God, my children were not with me that one time (as any other time they would have been). I am so thankful. I am however very upset with the turn of events.

I am thankful that this will hopefully be all over as soon as my medical payments are paid out and I am no longer in credit limbo for something I did not do.

I want to cry - STILL.

I am sensitive, and I stress easily, it's hard to take care of your kids when you are stressed to death, and you can't pick them up because your lower back is aching.

There are a lot of "woulda, shoulda, and coulda's" involved. I just want the nightmare to end.

I want to never see a commercial with that smiling little insurance character EVER again. - Sadly one is right by my house (agh).

Again, I should say I have no real hard feelings for my adjuster, she is just doing her job, and is probably up to her neck in claims. If only people would learn to pay attention when they drive, be considerate of others they share the road with, and if only you had magical powers to make your car disappear when someone is fixing to hit you.

If only....

I don't wish this on my worst enemy.

Accident Follow Up

So I saw the chiropractor today. I had 6 X-Rays done. Turns out my headaches are because accident caused the vertebrae in my neck to become misaligned. I also have something going on with my lower back that has caused my pelvis to tilt (not sure I wasn't really understanding lol).

So I go 3 x a week for an activator adjustment. Hopefully that will help. I have heard only good things about this establishment, as three of my friends swear by the doctor.

I know I am in good hands. The office is beyond friendly and wonderful. It is so nice to see that still exists.

So, moral of the story? Skip the visit to the hospital, because they will do the bare minimum, the chiropractor is MUCH MUCH MUCH cheaper and does xrays and works a plan to "fix you".

I am still waiting for hospital bills to come in. I contemplated hiring an attorney but I feel at this point I will just trust that the at fault driver's company will do the right thing. I really only care that my bills are paid, and I am compensated for my gas to and from my visits. Or if their is permanent damage - who knows.

My only qualm with an attorney is if it's not a fair settlement I am still in debt after paying the attorney fees. :/ They don't guarantee it will be enough to cover my bills. I say I give the insurance company a fair chance. (crossing my fingers) I hope I am not wrong here.

One Week

So, exactly a week ago, I had my accident. I see the chiropractor on Monday and hopefully he can tell me the root of these non stop headaches from the accident. The hospital didn't seem to care, it was the bare minimum. When I spoke to the chiropractor's office, they were both caring and kind. They answered any and all question's I have. And they assured me they would find where the damage was done on my body that is causing these never ending headaches. They said it is usually from compression either in the spine or neck.

All I can say is I hope it goes away. I hope they fix it. I really do.

I am so confused with the whole insurance process, I don't even know where to start. No one on the other end gives me clear cut answers and I feel they want way too much personal information. I think after my visit to the chiropractor on Monday and what I am told, I will then decide if it is in my best interest to avoid stress and just have a lawyer to the hands on. I don't understand the paper work or the releases, and I don't trust anyone to be honest. Never have, Never will.

When it comes to my health I don't trust the person trying to cut corners, sorry, I just don't.

If the lawyer charges 30% in contingency fees, it's worth it to me. All I really want is my medical bills paid. I did nothing wrong. Not a damn thing. I had been stopped for a good few minutes before this girl even sped up on me and rear ended me. I am just so bitter over it all. I told myself I wouldn't be, but after a week and having more stress from being given the run around and catching her insurance company in a lie, I don't trust them or trust they will do the right thing.

I feel they are acting on bad faith and I have my recorded conversations to prove it all.

I am not very smart, but I have enough common sense to know when to record something when someone is being fictitious with me.

Sitting on the brick steps outside watching my kids play has began to put so much stress on my mid back (which is also semi sore). I tried to browse craigs list to find a patio chair set, but really no such luck.

I won't pay full price for one, they are way too costly. So used is my way of life pretty much.

I think I am going to go to bed before I frustrate myself even more. Good night and good weekend to you all!

headache, headache, go away!!

It's so annoying to sit with my children and have these sporadic knife/ ice pick like jabs in my head. They are mostly in the back left, but just seem to radiate all over when they feel like it. It will be interesting to find what the chiropractor finds. I pray I never get rear ended again. Actually, I pray I never get in a car accident again. I pride myself on being a good driver. I have never in my life had a speeding ticket or any other kind of ticket.

Just today as I dropped MiMi off to school some one wasn't looking and cuts me off. I beep the horn to let them know "hey look out, I saved your butt". They just waved and smiled. (shrug). Who wants to get in an accident? Not me (again). And would avoid one at all cost. This sucks.

The backs of my ankles feel strained too. I wonder if it's because  I wore healed boots when she hit me? Probably unrelated. Who knows? My ankles don't concern me. My head does. I can careless about any other minor petty stuff that I have going on, but the headaches are just beyond aggravating.

Especially when you are the only caregiver for your two kids, you just can not rest. and it linger and lingers. I will be happy once I find relief from this all.

Doug is out money from a day of work, I am going to be out money for a baby sitter and a prescription and I am just thankful I actually have money to cover this at the moment, but it's so aggravating that money that SHOULD be for your children is going to something someone else caused. :(( NOT NOT NOT happy about this.

If I am grumpy and complaining, I apologize. I am just having a "woe is me" moment. I'll get over it once all is said and done. I guess in hindsight it could of been way worse. My kids weren't with me so that is the best blessing of all.

I want to get my chubby hands on home projects and I can't. Delays, delays. You never realize how much you do when you can't do as much. Oh well, accidents happen, it's a part of life. I just want it to be over with. :/

The car is being fixed as we speak.

Thursday Updates

Today I heard from the at fault person's insurance company. I gave a recorded statement on the accident itself, I am sure I left off some details as I have given the story time and again while trying to reach an adjuster to begin with.  Very frustrating. I also told about going to the hospital and my current pains (the headaches that do not subside but seem manageable, the neck aches that have gone away, the abdominal contusion healing on it's own and soreness in my back.

Later tonight  while Doug drove us to pick up dinner I started to notice my lower back was stiffening up and feeling "bruised". It's now 10:45 PM EST making it exactly 5 days and 45 minutes post accident and my lower back is killing me. I don't know what the hell..I really don't. I really assumed since the only real bother that night was my head (even though in the confusion of it all I forgot all about hitting my legs until I seen the bruises the next morning) that I would be fine. My swollen contusion showed up Sunday night and I waited to be seen for it until my follow up Monday morning.

Nothing else seemed a miss, the swelling from the contusion has all but faded away, my knee bruises had started to fade as well into a yellowy bruise. my headaches were constant until Wednesday, then they went away and came back all day today.

While thinking about this, I took the advice of my sister (who has been in a few rear end collisions and said the back pain down the road was not worth settling because it gets worse) and I scheduled to see a chiropractor.

I specifically asked if the headaches were something they could treat bc the hospital did a CT scan that later showed up normal. The person I spoke with reminded me that a CT scan only does certain look overs but the chiropractor will do his own x rays and that headaches are usually from spinal or neck injury. I never knew headaches were related to that, and am kind of mad the doctor's did not tell me.

I really hope the chiropractor can pin point the location that is causing them and resolve it. I also disagree with the police report that said she was doing 35, after seeing her in my rear view and looking at both our cars, there is no way. There really is no way. I literally sat there waiting to turn left and 3 cars had already passed as I was waiting for a few more to go so I could make my left turn (while fully stopped) i see her in my rear view speeding towards me, i look down and back up and she's not even slowing down. I look down and BAM.

I was so confused for a while until her passenger asked me how I was and I told him I hit my head really hard and didn't now if i was okay. I asked him to call 911 for an accident report to be done. When I called 911 myself after a few minutes and not being as confused I told the 911 operater I didn't know if i was hurt but I hit my head really hard and had a headache.

I thought this would be cut and dry. I wasn't even expecting to feel back pain 5 days later. It's ridiculous what someone's uncarefulness can do to you when you are obeying all the traffic laws.

Then getting hold of someone at her company was like a 3 ring circus. I and Doug both left messages on the original claims adjusters VM I will leave his initials (MB). He never called back. Tuesday I believe it was (maybe monday), I spoke with a guy named K. at insurance company and gave him my statement anf frustrations (unrecorded I believe) he told me my story matched hers and they accepted liability. He said he would email the info I gave him to MB. By Wednesday, I was still confused because I've never dealed with this before (accident/'insurance companies) and I called yet again, I believe the woman I spoke to was T. I told her I wanted a (insurance co name here) email invite to view my claim online. She then told me MB was not able to handle medical claims and got me a new adjuster (MBS). While talking to her I told her I spoke to K (which I did not recall his name at the time, she later gave it to me by the records). I told her he told me that they accepted responsibility. She says "he must of had his notes mixed up because our driver did not call yet".

I told her, "to stop right there, because he told me my story matched with hers 1. and 2 when state farm called geico to see if a claim had already been made, THEY (state farm) had given me the claim number, insurance adjusters name and his number).

Right after I tell her this she says, "actually miss murphy, she is calling in right now, can you please hold". STRANGE.

At that point I did not trust her and broke out my camera nad recorded the remainder of hte conversation. I figure if they are willing to lie that early on I may need it later if I need it.

Today *THURSDAY at 10:37 am* MBS calls and talks to me for a bit then I agree to give a recorded statement.  I told her the jist of the accident but probably not every single detail as I was rushed to get it out since my son was in the room and to be honest when she initially called I was on the phone with my sister and when I clicked over before saying "hello" I heard her say "Oh my GODDDD" in a sarcastic tone. Which kind of set the mood for me that I was probably going to be in over my head. I also told her about going to Cape Fear and my follow up apt. When asked how I felt now, I said I still have headaches, my neck soreness is subsiding or gone, my abdominal contusion is healing on it's own and my back is sore but probably hearling (but what do I know I am not an MD). I don't recall what else I said. Oh, the damage to my an dthe other drivers car, to which I said I am not a mechanic, but I described what I seen and told her I uploaded photos on the claim to their website. She did seem nice at the end and even answered questions about the medical billing process with my own insurance company since I had false info.

While picking mimi up from school, Ethan was asleep so I called a chiropractor to set up the apt. So far this is what's going on. I figured I'd keep track of it on my blog, because my memory is kind of in the here and now with two kids I can hardly remember where I put my keys most days when they are in my own hand.

I called an attorney but I am still debating if I want to use one. I figure if the insurance company compensates all my bills and is truly fair in the settlement I don't want to go out of my way to get an attorney, I am not out to make money but I do expect full compensation since none of this was my fault and I don't know what other help I will need in the future. One of the manyh mailers I got from attorneys and chiropractors stated some soft tissue damage can show up to 2 weeks afterwards. grief. I really hope that this isthe final pain to show up because I am over it. I have no help with my kids and I need to be the best mom I can be for them.

Accident updates

My head hurts. It hurts so bad. It's like a never ending LITERAL headache since Saturday night. First it throbbed and was achy all over. Now it's like someone is taking a knife, or ice pik and shoving it in my brain and twisting it and pulling it out. It's aweful. I would not wish it on anyone. It's hard to focus on my kids when my head just won't stop bothering me. Sunday night I took my first dosage of TY3. It made me puke so hard Iwill never take it again. I am NOT a fan of medication anyway, but this pain just lingers. My 118/77 blood pressure days have turned into 158/102 days. I now it's the pain causing the spike.

Other times it feels like my head is a water balloon being filled with water and it's so stuffy and full. :(

After puking my TY3 up last night I noticed swelling the length of a water bottle under my right breast bone. It was so painful when I sat or leaned forward. Today (Monday) I went to the doctor's for a follow up. They diagnosed me with Motor vehicle related cephalgia (from the headaches) and abdominal contusion.

I just want the headaches to stop:(

The worst part of all of this is Geico has yet to call me, yet to return Doug's phone calls and the adjuster is impossible to reach. Because of this we went through our agency (State Farm), who says they will go after GEICO. And apparantly when GEICO feels good and ready they will contact me to settle. To be honest? I don't now if I will. Their lack of compassion is ridiculous, as far as I am concerned I can just keep visiting the doctor for this pain on THEIR tab.

You don't even realize how sore you are when you hit your head until the following days. When I hit my head so hard all i could focus on wast he immense pain and immediate headache. It was so bad I didnt even remember hitting my knees (which are now bruised up as well). Or that the seat belt shoved so far into my ribs that it swelled up my liver area.

I really do pray none of this gets worse and it works itself out. And I am thankful to State Farm for causing less stress by taking this over. I really despise GEICO at the moment, 3 days after my accident and no contact? Someone needs to lose their job :/

Saturday night accident..

So I went to take MiMi to spend the night at my parents house Saturday night, it was about 8 pm. I stayed to watch a movie and left 10 before 10 pm. I was sitting at a complete stop waiting for cars to pass so I could make a left hand turn to go home when I look in my rear view mirror and see this car hauling you know what. I think, well they will slow down, when i realize they aren't slowing at all, I look down close my eyes and say a prayer. It happened so fast I don't remember every detail, just throwing my hand in front of my face as I was shoved forward but not having enough time to block my head as it was thrown back into the head rest. I remember my knees hurting but the pain in my head quickly made me forget all about my legs. I sat there with my hand on my head shaking. I couldn't even call the cops. I just sat there confused. At some point someone came to my car and asked if I was alright or hurt. I said my head hurt really bad when I hit it and could they please call the cops for an accident report.

I remember calling my Dad to call Doug since I never get through on Doug's phone. and I remember calling 911 after that, 10 minutes must of gone by and I was so confused I don't remember exactly what I told the 911 operator, other than I was trying to remember the name of the road and my head hurt badly but I didn't know if it was my blood pressure or what.

Eventually when I got my composure as cars sped past us, I pulled over to the grassy shoulder and put my E lights on.

I got out of my car and as I did the ambulance and fire dept showed up. I didn't know what to say other than I was shaken and I didn't know much else. I told them to go on and I didn't want to take their time if someone else needed them more. I said I would have Doug take me to the hospital to check my head.

The cops asked questions, and I honestly don't remember much else. I remember the driver telling me in her exact words, "I am so sorry, I told my mom I needed new tires". All I could think is, you didn't even stop, or try, she was speeding, I know that much, she was going so fast.

This is what her car looked like after she hit me while I was at a dead stop (courtesy of Doug):

I have no clue how they were not hurt, but I am thankful they were not.

My car was pushed so far. It wrinkled the top of my car up by the back glass, it pushed my trunk open, pushed the wheels off the ground, knocked the tail lights out of the sockets and the bumper was a mangled mess of evidence of where her car road on top of mine.

The tow truck showed up, and the officer gave me an exchange slip. I went to the hospital where they did a CT scan, I tried to avoid it but they said they needed to do it. I as given a prescription and told to come back in 2 days to do a follow up.

We called our insurance last night, I guess we call the local office tomorrow since nothing will be open until Monday. I don't know if my vehicle is salvageable, I just pray they cover enough to replace the exact same kind of car.

I will say from the looks of the car, I am so thankful God answered my prayers. I am most thankful that I decided at the last minute to leave Ethan with Doug. Had either of my kids been in the car I would of gone insane.

I just pray this is not going to be a long drawn out process. I have no car to take my daughter to school so she is staying with me tomorrow (it was a half day anyway) and I have to call to figure out how to get her on the crowded bus schedule now.

My head is still pounding, my neck and lower back started with the stiffness, but those aches are manageable and not too severe. The only thing I hate is this never ending headache. I took one of my prescriptions but I am not a fan of medication so will only take it again if it becomes worse.

I am so thankful it was not worse..